Growing Pains

Why is it that it can be hardest on the mom to see her kids growing up? Does this happen to everyone? Or I wonder sometimes if it is just me...

I see my three kids growing up before my very eyes...and I am one great big "mother hen". I love to know where my kids are and what they are doing - and I truly enjoy being involved in their day-to-day lives.

So...it's been a bit of a transition for me to take some baby steps in learning to "let go" of my kids. I'm guessing most of you might read this and think I am completely crazy...because the things I am talking about are really NOT that "big of a deal"...but sometimes the "little things" can really be the "big things"...it's just that you don't totally notice them until they have passed by. Like, when did your kids stop calling you "Mommy" and start calling you "Mom"? Mine still do use both terms...but when exactly did that all start?

From the moment Madelynne was born, almost 8 years ago, I knew deep within my heart that this motherhood "thing" was what God had called me to do...and I felt such a weighty responsibility!!!

This summer, we've been visiting a lot of parks (in fact, I briefly lost my camera at one of them!). The kids have gotten to be almost completely independent in their play (some of you are probably saying...OF COURSE they are...the are 7, 6, and 4!)...but, so much of my "mom-role" has been to be their helper! I am also the person who has actually had the fleeting thought that the kids might be safer on the playground with a helmet! There are lots of sharp corners...and they are often aiming head-first into something anyway...

*SIGH*

Seriously though, my point being...it is a bit strange to sit back, relax, and just WATCH the kids play. Don't get me wrong...it's NICE...but it is just different!

The girls have been attending Elementary SPA (Summer for Performing Arts) at one of the local high schools (where my husband teaches during the school year). They absolutely LOVE it...and have enjoyed this experience with their good friends, Kylie & Mackenzie. My husband has teased me a bit, as this really is the FIRST thing I have sent the girls to on their own...it is every day, for an hour-and-a-half, and I have dropped them off every day for the past two weeks! They have attended LOTS of other activities: dance, gymnastics, swimming lessons, Vacation Bible School, MOPS, etc - but I have always been there...either watching or teaching! So, it has been another small "growing pain" for me to drop them off into the care of other adults (whom I don't know!) - but, like I said, they have thoroughly enjoyed it and have a performance on Friday that they cannot WAIT for me to see!!! And I can't wait to see it, either. I'm so thankful for what a positive experience this has been for them.

Finally, this weekend, the girls got their ears pierced. Jason's mom was in town and had given Chloe some birthday money...which I used to get her a few things she needed (like a bike helmet, a shirt, and a new dress) and a few things she didn't really need (a pair of "swim Barbies" - she LOVES Barbies!) and then I set some of the money aside to use for her to get her ears pierced. And, how could we let one sister get her ears pierced and not the other? So, we brought both of the girls to the mall this weekend. They were SO excited...yet nervous, too. I'm sure you can tell from the pictures...I thought Madelynne looked just ill - poor little thing - but she was a trooper! Chloe was OK until the actual piercing...then she had some tears. But they only lasted a few minutes. Now they are just tickled pink to have their own earrings...and they are SO excited to show off their "bling" as flower girls in my brother's upcoming wedding!

On a positive note, Lukas has been going to bed MUCH better each night - we do think the sun and outdoors have been a major HELP in that area...but we will take all of the help we can get!

And...just to remind me that my kids aren't ALL that "grown up"...my eldest decided to pitch a 30-minute FIT tonight (she was fighting with her dad about conditioner, of all things). I guess fits can happen at any age...but it still reminded me that even though I see my kids growing up quickly...they are still little!

The Adventures of Little Camera

Once upon a time there was a little camera. It's real name was Canon PowerShot A85, but it's family referred to it as Little Camera. Little Camera lived quite happily with Mom, Dad, Big Sister, Little Sister, and Little Brother and was toted from place to place, snapping pictures here and there. Little Camera wasn't fancy and couldn't really do any special tricks, but it always got the job done. Sometimes Mom complained about Little Camera. She wanted more mega pixels, faster shutter speeds, and clearer shots. But Little Camera would just have to do until Mom saved up enough money to bring home a BIG camera.

One day, Little Camera went to the park with Mom and the kids. They picnicked and played with friends, taking pictures all the while, and had a grand old time until Big Sister and Little Brother wound up in time out. This quickly led to a speedy departure from the park. A few days later, Mom went to upload some pictures from Little Camera (she was thinking about a blog post she wanted to work on!)...but Little Camera was nowhere to be found.

"HMMM," thought Mom. "Now where is Little Camera? Let's see...not in my purse...not next to the computer...not in the van...not on the counter or by the front bench or in any of the bedrooms..." Suddenly she gasped. "The last time I had Little Camera was at the park...three days ago!"

Mom felt awful. How could she have forgotten Little Camera at the park? What had happened to Little Camera? Had someone found it? Would anyone turn it in if they did? Where would they bring it? Would it be gone forever?

It was almost dark and an evening shower had just blown through. Mom grabbed her keys and headed to the park. She looked around the shadowy wet park, but Little Camera was not there.

"Oh, Little Camera," lamented Mom. "What ever am I going to do? Now I have NO camera! I should have been more thankful for Little Camera."

She drearily made her way back home...disappointed that Little Camera was still missing. Dad encouraged her not to lose hope. Surely Little Camera would turn up somewhere. Mom went to bed determined to do her best to locate Little Camera in the morning.

The next day at breakfast, Mom gathered the kids together. "Guys...Mommy can't seem to find Little Camera. Have any of you seen it?"

They all shook their heads. No one knew where it was.

"Well...if you do happen to find it, will you please tell Mommy? Otherwise, I think I might have lost it at the park on Monday. That's the last time I remember seeing it."

"We'll look for it - and if we find it, we won't forget where it is so we can tell you," said Big Sister.

"Let's all pray that God will help us to find Little Camera," suggested Mom. So they bowed their heads and prayed together.

On a whim, Mom tried calling the Park District Office.

"I have a strange question," she began. "I was at Picnic Park on Monday and think that I may have left my Little Camera there. Would there be any chance that someone might have found it...and if they did, where would I call to find out?"

"Well, Ma'am, what kind of camera did you lose?" questioned Park District Office Employee.

"It was a Canon PowerShot A85."

"We do have a Canon PowerShot A85 here...and it was found at Picnic Park on Monday," replied Park District Office Employee.

"You're kidding me! That is SO great! I can't believe it!" exclaimed Mom. "I will be there to pick it up today."

Mom called the kids together to tell them the good news...but she couldn't stop crying.

"What's wrong, Mommy? What's wrong?" asked Big Sister.

"It's OK...everything is OK. God answered our prayers to find Little Camera. Someone found it at Picnic Park and turned it in to the Park District Office!"


The moral(s)of the story:
Be thankful for your Little Camera. You never know when you might not have it any longer.

If you ever find a little camera (or a big camera, or a wallet, or a purse, or a diamond-encrusted tiara, or anything that belongs to someone else), please turn it in. You'll make that missing item's family very happy - even if they cry when they find it.

21st Century Kids

Recently, I've been reminded that my kids are being raised in "modern" times. Not quite to the extent where I feel the need to tell them about "walking to school, uphill, in a blizzard..." (that wouldn't totally be true, anyway!). Nonetheless, I am aware that in many ways their lives are different, simply because of the era into which they were born!

One of the first times I can recall thinking about this was when I was looking at an alphabet poster with Madelynne. She was maybe 2 or 3 and when we came to the letter Q, there was a picture of a quarter. She guessed it was a DVD! :-)

The other day, the girls were playing in their room and I heard them reciting some sort of commercial...as if they were hosts of a TV show. The funniest part to me was hearing them say: "Find more stories and games. Click on www-DOT-12-dancing-princesses-DOT-com!". I remember, LONG ago, playing with my sister and recording "commercials" on the good old cassette tape recorder!

Finally, I had taken the girls grocery shopping with me and, in the search for the BIGGEST watermelon, somehow we mistakenly put a SEEDED watermelon into the cart. As a kid, seeded watermelons were the only kind I knew existed...but my kiddos have been raised on seedless! At home, the kids couldn't get over how many BIG BLACK seeds were in there! After eating it for a few days, Lukas lamented, "This is just TOO much work to eat...getting all of those seeds outta there!!!"

The Rumors are True...

I'm officially another year older!

Thank you, Kristi, for planning a fun "girl's night out" on Friday night! Some friends and I ate at a local Mexican restaurant, I was blessed with some fun gifts, Kristi and I shopped a bit, saw a BEAUTIFUL double rainbow, and then we enjoyed a $1 movie, too (College Road Trip) - it was cute, clean, and quite touching as the plot revolved around a protective father learning to "let go" of his daughter as she grows up.

On Saturday, my hubby set up a few surprises for me including a family outing to a local park, arranging for our dear friends to join us for dinner (I do LOVE eating out!), and then we all indulged in chocolate cake for dessert! Thank you, Jason!

I truly feel blessed by my family and friends...thank you ALL for making my birthday a special day! :-)

From the mouths of babes...

Or in this case, from the mouth of my 7-year old!

The other day the kids and I were in the kitchen, making up some scrambled eggs for supper. The kids love to have "breakfast for dinner" and often, this is the tradition on Sunday nights. Madelynne especially likes to help crack the eggs and mix them up. On this particular night she was "teaching" Chloe and Lukas the step-by-step process.

Now, I don't know about your house, but it seems we have some sort of conversation about chickens and eggs any time an egg is cracked.

As Madelynne cracked the egg into the bowl, Lukas exclaimed, "Whoa...I thought a baby chicken was going to fall out of there!"

To which Madelynne responded, "Don't worry, Lukas...these eggs are not *paralyzed*!"

A Little Bit Better...

I know you have just been waiting on pins and needles to hear about my son's sleeping habits...

Sunday night was better - he stayed in his room for over an hour after we put him to bed, but then he came out twice at 9:10 and 9:20 PM (I think maybe he was just trying to "outwit, outlast, outplay" us!). But, I guess 2 times is better than 5 times, so even though he wasn't sleeping when we were hoping he would be, there was some improvement!

Monday morning he was UP early (before 7:00 - that's early to me!) and he proceeded to wake up the girls, too...which I was not too happy about. The problem then just becomes a "vicious cycle" and he's overtired for the day - and, no, he does not nap, either (I think he stopped taking naps sometime before he turned 3 - I guess I would know had I kept a blog, huh?).

After numerous incidents, eruptions, and time-outs throughout the day, I finally had him go into his room to spend some quality time by himself (his time-outs are usually in the bathroom!)...this was around 4:20 in the afternoon. The girls were outside and we were chatting with our friends who had been over to play for the afternoon. After they left, I went in to check on Lukas (it was now about 4:40). I walked into his room, thinking he would be sitting on his bed reading a book or perhaps playing with some Lego's, but this is what I found:

I had a moment of panic...where was he? Did he go outside without me knowing? My heart started thumping. Then I heard it...the snoring!

That's when I peeked around the door and saw this:

He had fallen asleep! I could not believe it...I can't remember the last time Lukas fell asleep before bedtime (except for when he has been sick or maybe when we have been travelling...). The poor kid has been sooooo overtired! I woke him up right away - because I wanted him to sleep at night!!! He was pretty groggy, though.

As I said, things have been a little bit better - last night he did not come out once (except to go to the bathroom) and he was asleep probably by 8:30 - a vast improvement from the last few nights!!!

Please know that my intention here is not to give my son a "bad rap"...I love him so very dearly and he will always, always, always have such a special place in my heart. I do believe he is a "strong-willed" child...and I also believe that the Lord placed him in my life to prune me in many areas (wow - so many areas!). It is with tears in my eyes that I write this...because I'm guessing that one day I will look back at this time and wish I were dealing with something as *simple* as bedtime. I also know that these disciplinary struggles and the setting of boundaries (with each of my kids!) are all part of the job of training and bringing up my children in a way that I pray will one day lead each one's heart to the Lord.

Oh, Lord...you know the depth of my love for each of my children. You know the heartache I can feel when I see them making wrong choices. You also know my desire to show them YOU through me. Please teach me...grow me...yes, even stretch me! Lend me Your wisdom - I can so often feel SO inept. I long for each of them to see Your heart in me as I strive to love and discipline them! Thank you for being my strength when I am weak. Amen.

Proverbs 22:6
Train a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not turn from it.

Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep...

I need to know...

how to get this boy...

to sleep at night!

Lately, our little guy has been challenging us at the bedtime hour (not to mention all of the other hours of the day...but right now, let's just focus on bedtime!). I will begin by saying that he has never been a "good sleeper". I take full responsibility for my part in this...I was never good at letting my kids "cry it out" and thus, I had lots of sleepless nights during the baby days. Self-induced, I know...but I also have to say our eldest and our youngest were exceptionally fussy babies (we actually did have a "good sleeper" with Chloe - so we had a little taste of what that was like!). :-)

Lukas shared a room with my husband and me for the first few months of his life and then we moved him into the girls' room (all three of the kids shared a room in our little 2-bedroom duplex!). This worked OK until he realized he had an audience and soon he started interfering with their sleep!

That summer after Lukas was born was one of VERY little sleep for our entire family...he was fussy, he wanted to nurse [what seemed like] all of the time, and, as I said, he just never slept great. To add to all of that, both of the girls were struggling with eczema (a skin condition) - and were often awake in the middle of the night scratching, crying, and very uncomfortable!

Eventually, though, things settled down and all of the kids seemed to be improving in the sleep department. Then, Lukas learned to climb out of the crib...and the pack-n-play...and so we moved him to a toddler bed. Once again, we had to move him back OUT of the girls' room and into ours, so he wouldn't wake them! Can you see why we were looking for a 3-bedroom house???

While we lived with dear friends for several weeks last summer, it took Lukas the longest to "adjust" to our new living quarters...and when we finally moved in to our new home, he had his very own room! To our dismay, he often has tears at bedtime, because he doesn't want to be "alone"...

Of course, we know SOME DAY he will be so proud of his very own room and he will relish in having his own space, but now - especially these last few weeks, he is having a hard time. He has always wrestled with knowing how to settle himself down, so we have focused on having him stay in his room. He can look at books, he can listen to music - as long as he stays put!

Many nights we will find him sleeping on the floor, like this:

Or this:

Even though he has a perfectly comfy bed to sleep in, like this:

But last night...last night was a rough night. We have been giving Lukas swats as a consequence for coming out of his room...but it lately has not been working at all! So, last night we decided to take four items away each time he got out of bed. Often, the consequence we give (and sometimes even the reward) will correlate with the age of the child - since Lukas is four, he has a four-minute time out, or four swats, or gets to take four books to bed to read - of course, sometimes this has no bearing and/or just doesn't work - it's just something we have used! Anyway, we explained this new "consequence" to him and soon took four "animals" away when Lukas came out around 8:00 PM (just 15 minutes or so after we had put him to bed). That was when the screaming began. He tested us four more times in the next hour and a half...and lost a total of 20 items! What kid has 20 things in their bed?, you might ask. Well, the last four things I took were his pillow, his "rice pack" (each of the kids have one and we heat it up for them before bed), his puppy and his "zuffy" (fuzzy) fleece blanket. He was sooooo mad at me! That was around 9:20 PM and after about 10 more minutes of screaming, it was finally quiet.

This is what I found when I went to check on him:

He was totally and completely zonked out!

I gently put him back in bed, tucked him in, and placed his stuffed animals back around him...as he ought to be.

I wonder what tonight will bring?

If you have any great ideas for getting feisty four-year-olds to sleep, Jason and I sure would love to hear them! I'm feeling a bit at the end of my rope...but I'm praying for the Lord to give me PATIENCE and ENDURANCE as we train our children. It is with a HUGE sigh that I'll say I'm sure one day we will look back on this and laugh...but sometimes I have a feeling that day is a LONG way off!!!